i had a wonderful chitchat with a very good highschool friend early this morning (at the wee hours of the morning my time and mid-morning her time). My then frenemy and i keep in touch as much as we can, chatting about the good ole days (which pretty much includes updates on the lives of our other batchmates).
we talked about our lives, the theater, boys or men in our lives, and of course who did who. For some reason though, we found ourselves talking about a guy who both broke our hearts. We were down memory lane yet again. Then she reminded me about her most recent trip here wherein they sorta rekindled their friendship (hanging out one whole day). I could not remember her telling me about this! i was totally clueless (with a tinge of betrayal). so she had to gab about the whole thing again. Alas alas, mr. you broke our hearts was apparently attached even then (what's his deal?!?!? a couple of summers ago he was suddenly back in my life *textswise*. as in really back. but he never bothered to tell me that he and his a.k.a. bestfriend are together! that i'll never figure out).
Anywho, after that brief trip down memory lane i was obsessed about the girl again. I had to put a face to the name. Thanks to those sick social networks we get to efficiently stalk people.hahaha. I had to put a face to the name. While i was in the pursuit of putting a face to the name, i finally remembered this story. She did tell me about it as soon as we got hold of each other after the incident. I knew about it. I could even remeber what I exactly felt after the big revelation (seriously, like some sick puppy i knew even then that they were together, i was in simply denial).
to summarize: I forgot about the whole thing as a knee-jerk reaction, a matter of self preservation. As I learned during our psych class in college, we repress certain memories precisely to protect ourselves from the intense emotions that comes with these memories.
sidenote: I woke up a lil earlier than usual this morning. and guess what i did it. i cleaned up my phonebook. removed ceratin contacts. clean slate. tabula rasa.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Thought you might like this:
ReplyDelete"Memories are important, but there is, too, a wisdom in forgetting, in distancing ourselves from the sadness of the past. There are times when we are simply not strong enough to deal with our memories and so they wait for us to grow stronger--some instinctive knowing within us honors that fear. When we are ready, reminders will come in little ways, and within these reminders will come the necessary strength of remembrance." ;)